I knew by the size of the envelope that it was an acceptance letter, but I still held my breath when Principessa tore into it. This was her top-choice university and the outcome could make or break her sanity. She was ecstatic for a solid five minutes until nervousness set in.
I’ve tried reassuring her without being untruthful. Sort of like telling a toddler that a vaccine shot will hurt – but only for a minute.
To be honest, I’m questioning my success in preparing her for what’s ahead. My confidence in this regard has been taking hits of late. Like when we were driving at night. I flipped my rear-view mirror to block the headlight glare from behind. “Wow!” Principessa exclaimed. “Does every car have that feature?!”
This is the same honors student who thought that the car made its own windshield washer fluid. No joke.
I find myself dispersing random facts of life at every opportunity to ensure that I’ve covered all possible topics before releasing my first-born to the world. A crash course in Life, if you will.
- Expect to feel free. You are about to grasp that Golden Ring of Freedom that every teen craves. For the first time, you’ll have no parental supervision. But let me remind you that even in the absence of authority, actions have consequences. And the fact that you will make more of your own decisions means that you will assume more of the responsibility for the outcome. Think before you act. Or as your grandpa the carpenter would say, “Measure twice. Cut once.”
- Expect to feel lonely. Even if you’ve forged strong bonds with new friends and are having the time of your life, you will, at some point, feel lonely. You may be standing shoulder to shoulder in a crowd of 10,000 students on the college quad and it will strike you that you are utterly alone. The good news is that loneliness is a slingshot. It propels you back in the direction of meaningful connection. Just as spontaneously as you fell into loneliness, you will reconnect and wonder what your heart was fussing about.
- Expect to feel amazed. You probably feel pretty worldly already. But I assure you, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet. Get ready for jaw-dropping stories and experiences, the likes of which may test your faith in humanity. You’re leaving a bubble of relative predictability and heading to a melting pot of cultures, customs and values. This isn’t a bad thing. If you observe from a reasonable distance like a wildlife researcher, your observations will resemble a really good movie. Grab some popcorn.
- Expect to be betrayed. There’s no sugar-coating this one, darling. A friend will tell your secret, or a roommate may steal your boyfriend. But at the end of the day, there will always be more good in the world than bad. I can’t give you scientific proof of this, but I believe it with all my heart.
- Expect to be loved. You know this one. Love has no boundaries. Your family will not forget you or wane in our affection while you’re gone. Your place in our hearts is guaranteed.
What I’m trying to say, my dear, is that yes, college is a big deal for a small-town girl. But it’s just another season of life. There will be harsh Winters AND glorious Springs. As long as your heart beats, you will weather the seasons, because that’s what humans do. They live through all manner of experiences from horrific tragedy to mind-blowing joy. Some survive and others thrive. Each decides.
Chaos & Clarity 